[Girlie]

Ok PLEASE HELP. I car pool with someone to school (downtown) and I want to tell her I no longer want to but I am not sure how. Here is the situation (I will try to make this short).

Last semester we drove every day with no difficulty until the end. She confronts me one day and says I am inconsiderate of her time and I need to be ready earlier. Now the truth be told, I am not good at getting out of bed so honestly I would guess aprox. 2X per week should would have to wait 5min for me to finish getting ready. (NOT 10 or 15) Then she busts in about me making stops on the way home. Those times constituted me picking up a tomato (this took <5min) and picking up glasses (this also took < 5 min) Both times I asked her first if she minded and she replied with "no." I think I also may have gotten gas a couple of times. (no more than 2 or 3) So I take into consideration and I try to be ready everyday and I make no stops at all.

Ok.... she comes to my house 15 min late EVERYDAY!!!! I tried joking about it but she did not get it. What is wrong with this?

(there is more - start pondering this)

 

[Snowbi-Wan]

Tell her she smells and you don't like being in the car with her.

 

[All Jacked Up]

Just do it like your breaking up with her.

Give her the ( It's not you it's me ) routine.

O.K. seriously, just say that your work or home schedule has changed and you can't make the car pooling work.
On the other hand you could start nagging her to death until she doesn't want to do it anymore.

 

[pauligan]

waiting for the rest...

 

[Dookie]

make life less difficult, drive to school by yourself

 

[RED HOT ONE]

LIKE ALL BAD RELATIONSHIPS IT SOUNDS AS THIS ONE IS COMING TO AN END.

BUT I WOULDN`T WANT TO SEE YOU TWO MAD AT EACH OTHER SO PART IT ON FRINDLY TERMS.

I SUGGEST:

1. EXPLAIN YOU DON`T WANT TO LOSE HER AS A FRIEND
2. TELL HER BY DRIVING YOUR OWN CARS GIVES YOU BOTH FREEDOM TO DO WHAT YOU WANT BEFORE OR AFTER SCHOOL.
3. PUT IT ALL ON YOU, SAY THAT YOU ARE DOING THIS FOR HER.

 

[Adios]

Tell her you find her VERY ATTRACTIVE !
And when you look at her your are about to flood your panties, and you want her to touch you. And you want to show her how you can teach her the ways of the girlie action.

That should do it, unless she is a lesbian, and in that case, CAN I WATCH !?

Let me know if you need anymore advice !

 

[Taxman]

Take an extra class.....Sorry I have to drive myself....maybe next term

 

[All Jacked Up]

QUOTEFast~Eddie Posted on Oct 3 2003, 04:09 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tell her you find her VERY ATTRACTIVE !
And when you look at her your are about to flood your panties, and you want her to touch you. And you want to show her how you can teach her the ways of the girlie action.

That should do it, unless she is a lesbian, and in that case, CAN I WATCH !?

Let me know if you need anymore advice !

LMFAO

 

[Girlie]

3 weeks ago I had to go to Grand Rapids for a conference so I shared a hotel room with the girl I carpool with (we will call her

) and 2 other girls. Things were fine until we went to the bar later. Soon as we got to the bar

had nothing to do with us. She hung out with a different group. Which is fine I was not offended. Well when they left she decided she wanted to. So she does not hang out with me ALL night but wants to go. The hotel is a couple of blocks away so having heard she wanted to go, I went to see if she wanted me to walk w/her. It was still early, I would have come back. I ask her and in front of my teacher says, "NO! I am just going. Do not worry about it!" She says this very snotty and makes it look like I had refused or we had argued about it. I thought I was being a good friend but not allowing her to walk alone by herself at night.

THIS UPSET ME!!!

When we returned at 2:30 am she wants me to drive home (3 hrs away). That is denied. So the alarm is set at 5:45 the next am. Alarm goes off and she is like "are we leaving or what?!" NOBODY else wants to go. So I am pissy about it. I get my stuff and warn if I am driving 3 hrs after 3 hrs sleep SOMEONE had better stay up with me. (Is this out of line?) SO we all leave even though 3 of 4 do not want to. When we get home nobody says 2 words to

and she does not even thank me for getting her home early.

After this things are not the same. There is definite tension I make an attempt to straighten things out. We talk about what happened and she goes on a tangent about what an insensitive person I am.

Her boyfriends father had passed away the week before we went away. I went out of my way for

. I sent flowers, I brought her lunch, and listened to her. WHY? Because I care about her as a friend.

INSENSITIVE!!!!!!!

HOW?! She said I should have known she would not have had fun at the bar she just was having a hard time. Now this really bothered me. She was fine until her 'other friends left' so what does this have to do w/me?

I think if she was truly THAT distraught she would have just stayed home. I feel that she is trying to make me feel bad and I do not understand why?

So after we talked I am so hurt and I do not want to hang out with her. I do not want to carpool.

AND... I will see her 5X a week for the next 6 mos so I do not want to make things horrible. How do I tell her?

This is really frustating for me. Thanks for reading this LONG saga. I appreciate your advice!!!

 

[MrsP-29fun police]

Ok, here is what I would do. I would let her know that you feel too rushed in the morning and that you would prefer to drive separate. Also, tell her that sometimes you like to stop and run errands on the way home and that you feel bad that you are holding her up.

just my .02

I will do it if you want me too!!

 

[MrsP-29fun police]

Ok, I just read the other part that you wrote.

I would tell her that you will carpool again with her when she starts taking prozac. She sounds a little unstable to me.

 

[pauligan]

Sounds like perhaps she is looking for the same thing: an out...

I like what the others have said, tell her you like the freedom to be a little late or to run errands, but I would also be honest with her and tell her there is obviously tension between the two of you and you don't understand the root of it but that you do care about her and obviously will be spending the next 6 months together but that perhaps the space will also benefit on other levels...

I always go for the truth...

 

[rerun]

Although this idea has blown up on me in the past I find it to be the best course of action. Tell her the truth. If she's your friend and someone that you'll cont. a friendship with you'll work it out. If not than it's baggage in your life that you don't need. Move on.

 

[Girlie]

I am not sure I want to be friends she REALLY hurt my feelings. I know I was a good friend to her. I just do not think she knows how to be one.

Let me give you an example... School is very stressful one day after school on the way home I just started crying. I had a difficult couple of days and she advice was to "quit being a drama queen everyone else has problems and things going on in their lives too."

Needless to say this did not make my day better.

What kind of friend says stuff like this?

Example 2: After working out I made a comment about how HOT I was. (if you know me I am full of sarcastic comments) SHe told me to "Get over myself" and walked away. Now for those of you that now me, do I sit around telling everyone how HOT I think I am? I was shocked. Is she for real?

She is just not nice.

 

[Adios]

QUOTE(Girlie @ Oct 3 2003, 03:19 PM)3 weeks ago I had to go to Grand Rapids for a conference so I shared a hotel room with the girl I carpool with (we will call her

) and 2 other girls.
ok i stopped reading here: Using my very creative imagination !

No really, i would ask her if you have offeneded her in any way, pending her answer,...and say you think it may be best if we drove seperate because you have been so busy and do have alot of errands to run and all....
Good Luck......Guys would just say shut the f*ck up, or drive yourself dipsh*t !

 

[ThreeCrabs]

Hi Girlie! I would tell her you have other errands to run before and after school <_< You may want to try and tell her the truth at the same time, but it doesn't sound like you will be able to have a adult conversation with this nut....Good luck to you!

 

[surfergirlck]

QUOTE(RED HOT ONE @ Oct 3 2003, 04:06 PM)LIKE ALL BAD RELATIONSHIPS IT SOUNDS AS THIS ONE IS COMING TO AN END.

BUT I WOULDN`T WANT TO SEE YOU TWO MAD AT EACH OTHER SO PART IT ON FRINDLY TERMS.

I SUGGEST:

1. EXPLAIN YOU DON`T WANT TO LOSE HER AS A FRIEND
2. TELL HER BY DRIVING YOUR OWN CARS GIVES YOU BOTH FREEDOM TO DO WHAT YOU WANT BEFORE OR AFTER SCHOOL.
3. PUT IT ALL ON YOU, SAY THAT YOU ARE DOING THIS FOR HER.
i agree.

you'll be fine, oh beautiful one!

be strong!

 

[btenn]

Just tell her that you will pick her up in the morning and then don`t.I think she will get the hint.

 

[bobrob]

i agree with three crabs tell her you have errands to run b 4 and after, that and to avoid her if she calls just start out by saying how busy youve been and hardly have any time to do anything, if she wants or ask you to go anywhere. let her catch your voice mail that way you dont have to deal with her and will have time to think up a excuse when you do see her.