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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
That they are getting too large (fat) ect??
I know it is a touchy subject.
But really if you care for someone, and it is in the best interest, how do you tell them ?
Also if you have been dating or been married a while , how would you tell your wife/husband/girlfriend, without totally offending them ?
Is there a time frame ?
 

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Eddie, I think you really need to ask yourself... you know the next time you decide to have a 2nd or 3rd helping, or sitting on the couch eating your Bon Bons and Twinkies.
 

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I don't think you do. Do you think that person hasn't noticed they've put on weight? When there readay to do something about it they will. Just my .02
 

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If it's a friend, really there is no way, especially if its a girl. Just don't even go there. (though I know I am guilty of telling people at times... always regret it)

If it's a significant other, then totally you have rights, but suggest more how about "we start getting healthy together" "let's join a gym" etc...

can't cast stones, ya know?
 

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yup... i wouldn't even go there.
re's right... when they're ready, they'll take care of it themselves. honest.
 

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If you are seriously asking, and before you this thread goes south. Girls are always saying "oh I'm getting fat and this and that" to each other and we are supposed to respond with "oh no you're not" which is BS. So IMO it is a touchy subject and if it really concerns you about someones girth then just be a little subtle like "hey have you been feeling good lately" or "hey I'm trying to lose some weight for summer do you want to join me and we can support each other" that way you too gotta lose some pounds.

And with a significant other subtlety still stands even tho you wanna say "man/woman you are getting to be one big heffer" wont get you laid or dinner so I always try the o.k. I'm going to the gym get your a$$ moving and let's go kind of thing, which isn't very subtle or hey "we" both have let ourselves go let's try and get in shape "together" that's all you can do really.

Bottom line people gotta want to lose weight/ look good on their own. I mean if it's to totally unhealthy porportions then an intervention might be needed, otherwise ya gotta let em' be.
All that being said, I'm heading to the gym......
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
1. I am far from shallow!

2. pauligan, ya think, you say some things, sometimes blurt them out before thinking what the other person may feel about it.
3. Not that i shave a friend or girlfriend, wife ect...to sasy this too
4. this is just a bullsh*t topic just like the 10,000 other ones here everyday.
5. just wondered peoiples opinions, not ment to offend, as i stated in first post.
6. re- was not directed at you at all bro !!!! I luv ya man !

7. Ok so if you were dating a girl or guy, and they are really growing, cause of too many whoppers, big macs, ect....and your like, hey, slow down,...ect....so your saying you would let this person continue to indulge and just say ok ? not shallow ! just being observant ect.....
I know many people here that would say something - so don't pretend you are holier than thow. if you dated for 6months, a year ect,...and your significant other just started to totally eat out of control.....you would just ignore it ?

Again, I have no problem with skinny, normal, chunky, large, wide, slender, tall, short, people at all !
 

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If it was a buddy, I'd tell him, a chick though - forget about being blunt as you'll be an a$$hole in their eyes, even if it's in good faith and they're on the brink of having a heart attack because of their health.

I turn it back on myself, like saying "Man I got to lose some wieght!" and then start telling them about what I'm polanning on doing, i.e. what I am changing in my diet, when I'm going ot go to the gym next. If they take the hint, then cool, they might say "Yeah me too", but if they cay nothing and reach for another twinkie, well, you've done all that you can.

With a s/o g/f, you can always tell them, but do it poilitely, obviously, or try cutting them off, then they'll begin to wonder why you are not attracted to them and it may make them want to do something about it.
 

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QUOTE(Fast~Eddie @ Feb 9 2004, 08:39 AM)That they are getting too large (fat) ect??
I know it is a touchy subject.
But really if you care for someone, and it is in the best interest, how do you tell them ?
Also if you have been dating or been married a while , how would you tell your wife/husband/girlfriend, without totally offending them ?
Is there a time frame ?
Eddie, your really threading on thin ice.... To actually attempt to say to your girlfriend/wife that your putting weight on, getting large or heavy is a big no no.. If you just came out and said something like that it would hurt their feelings and really upset them.. Trust me... I'm a big overweight dude and yes I need to loose weight for my health and so far I have lost 16 pounds since the first of the year.. My buddy said that's like taking a glass of water out of Lake St Clair... But, a guy can take being told that he's heavy and needs to loose weight... I would suggest that if you honestly care about someone's weight /health that you suggest that your feeling uncomfortable with your weight lately and that you want to look good for them and would they mind if they help you loose a few pounds and see what they say. Maybe they'll take the hint and say hey, I need to loose a few pounds too... Let's go on a diet together....
Eddie, never hurt a ladies feelings over weight... Trust me, they'll never forget....
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
QUOTE(jewels @ Feb 9 2004, 09:05 AM)If you are seriously asking, and before you this thread goes south. Girls are always saying "oh I'm getting fat and this and that"
all women say that...i don't know why <_< just to start arguments? for attention ? for a compliment out of it, say there not ?

again if this thread goes south i will simply have it removed, i only asked a question !


so answer it if you want......don't call me shallow, or anything similar,...CAUSE I AM NOT.
 

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QUOTE(Fast~Eddie @ Feb 9 2004, 10:11 AM)1. I am far from shallow!

2. pauligan, ya think, you say some things, sometimes blurt them out before thinking what the other person may feel about it.
3. Not that i shave a friend or girlfriend, wife ect...to sasy this too
4. this is just a bullsh*t topic just like the 10,000 other ones here everyday.
5. just wondered peoiples opinions, not ment to offend, as i stated in first post.
6. re- was not directed at you at all bro !!!! I luv ya man !

7. Ok so if you were dating a girl or guy, and they are really growing, cause of too many whoppers, big macs, ect....and your like, hey, slow down,...ect....so your saying you would let this person continue to indulge and just say ok ? not shallow ! just being observant ect.....
I know many people here that would say something - so don't pretend you are holier than thow. if you dated for 6months, a year ect,...and your significant other just started to totally eat out of control.....you would just ignore it ?

Again, I have no problem with skinny, normal, chunky, large, wide, slender, tall, short, people at all !
again Eddie. I'm not offended nor do I think others are, or at least I hope not. I have no clue the answer to your question though. I have broken up with girls in the past becasue of that situation never revealing why and just saying, "I'm not ready to have another relationship yet." I figure if they are comfortable that way and I am not comfortable with them like that, we shouldn't be together.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Again, I have no one I want to tell this to !
I am not directing this at anyone, I know, have seen, anyone a friends knows, a friends nextdoor neighbors, cousin's uncles daughters, sisters brotherin-laws, best friend ect......

it is just a friggen question.

general topic information......

maybe i should post mind numbing poop threads, or photo shop poop and faces on other pictures to have people in general more at ease, and less aggressive and attitudeily (yes i typed it) acceptable.
 

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Not all woman are offended when they are told they need to shed a few lbs. I'd definatly be upset at first, but then I'd realize what they meant and just get over it, and take care of the spare tire. But I'm a lot different then most woman, i guess.

I think a true friend should say what's on their mind rather than sit there and not do anything. Harsh or not, thats what true friends are for.

I've had people ask me if I was pregnant before....talk about a hint

(
been going to the gym ever since!)
 

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QUOTE(Fast~Eddie @ Feb 9 2004, 09:11 AM)1. I am far from shallow!

First thing that popped in my pea brain when I read the question was the movie Shallow Hal and it made me giggle......So, being the smart @$$ I am, I posted it!

I am a big, fat smarty pance and I am sorry nobody knows that by now! Do not take every little word I say seriously!

Besides.........I know you don't have a significant other <_< (for the moment, but that could change
)

And just cuz someone is fat doesn't mean they are the pig eating big macs, whoppers and super size french fries all the time! I personally don't eat that garbage. Just the occasional late night whitie


Eddie....peace-out!
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
QUOTE(pauligan @ Feb 9 2004, 09:28 AM)Eddie:

what is that ?

I must have tied my tie too tight this morning.........

I have been told by people i am getting fat.......ect......
so i was wondering what others do......
 
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